Joy Yang’s Blog

It’s easy to be positive in a positive environment. It’s when things are emotionally draining and negative that you are challenged to step up to the plate and behave differently. By doing so, you make a difference — a positive impact that sends ripples throughout the community in which you work. The fact is that positive energy catches on just as quickly as negative energy. Sometimes, people are simply stuck in a habit or pattern of behavior. They are accustomed to acting a certain way. If the environment is really caustic, then it’s been that way for a long time. This is what people are used to; it’s familiar to them, and it may be all they know. In addition, by the very fact that it’s been happening this way for this long and no one has done enough to change it, it’s considered “acceptable” even though it’s not.

It takes some time and effort on your part, as well as a commitment, to do something different in order to create sustainable change. You must be willing to identify and stop tolerating what’s not working, do the right thing even if it’s unpopular at first, and then teach others to do the same.

Here are five things you can do to be the positive force in your workplace.

1) Observe yourself in action. In what ways are you contributing to the negativity around you? Are you listening to gossip or participating in conversations where the only focus is to denigrate, diminish, or criticize people or things? If the conversation feels bad, it’s probably negative. Stop being negative! Stop saying or doing anything that is negative. It all starts with you. Language matters. Everything you say has an impact, and when you say something negative, not only does it dishonor the person you’re speaking about and the person you’re speaking with, it makes you feel bad even if you don’t realize it. Putting someone else down is disrespectful of them, and it disrespects you. Learn to respect people’s humanity and their right to be themselves. Complaining without end does not focus on creating solutions; rather its impact is only to perpetuate and magnify the problem, wasting everyone’s precious time and energy.

2) Recognize negativity when it occurs around you. Sometimes you can even feel your energy being drained by the words being spoken. Again, if it feels bad or uncomfortable, then it’s negative. These feelings are your inner messengers. They are a form of intelligence similar to a tap on the shoulder letting you know something is not right. How do you feel? What is happening? What behavior is being displayed? If you can identify what is happening, then you can make good choices about handling it. The first step is awareness.

3) Speak up! Tell the other person how you feel. Use the words, “This doesn’t work for me.” It’s non-judgmental and it’s about you, not them. People often don’t realize they are being negative. Point out to the person that they are being negative in a gentle and caring way. “Do you realize you are complaining?” Sometimes just bringing it to their attention is enough to shift the conversation. Over time, people will learn what they can and cannot talk about with you, and it won’t be an issue. If you say nothing, then your silence gives them permission to continue.

4) Make your conversations constructive, meaning that the conversation should be positive, meaningful, and beneficial. What’s the point or purpose of the conversation? Is it to hurt or help? And at the end of the conversation, what would you like to have happen? Is there an action step to take? Constructive conversations feel good. They are empowering and have the effect of leaving people a little better off from having participated in them. Become the kind of person who takes your time seriously and who takes your words seriously!

5) Offer praise! It’s amazing what a few words of praise and acknowledgement can do to make people feel good. You want people to feel good after being in your presence. You want to be the kind of person people gravitate to because they know they will be uplifted by you, not put down or drained of their life-sustaining energy.

Learning how to be positive as you navigate through life is part of life’s lessons. And no matter what is going on around you, you control your inner environment and how you choose to respond to external events and situations. It’s your responsibility to become the kind of person you enjoy being and with whom others enjoy being around. It takes a true leader to walk a path different from the crowd. So when others are negative, stretch your boldness muscles and be positive in spite of what others do or think. It’s the only way to create a ripple of change. And we know that from small beginnings come great things. If each of us does our part, then slowly but surely, we will make a difference in our work environment and the community at large.

By Julie Fuimano

Rule 1: Spread love. In order to produce great achievements, we have to take great risks. The greater the required achievement, the greater the personal risk involved. The greater the love we show and give, the greater the vulnerability, but the greater the return.

Rule 2: Learn from life. We have to learn from the lessons in life. When we do lose, as we all will from time to time, we should lose gracefully and learn from the lesson that life has taught us through the experience, turning it into a positive to build on.

Rule 3: Show respect. We need to respect others as we respect ourselves. Above all we should respect ourselves and show that respect. In today’s society, there seems to be a great lack of self-respect. Just look at the way people behave and dress.

Rule 4: Be responsible. We need to take full responsibility for all our actions. Always do things for the right reason and from a position of love for your fellow man. Remember that anything done for the greater good will always succeed.

Rule 5: Be ethical. Live a life that is honorable and ethical. Especially in today’s world, there seem to be a lot of questions about ethics and deceit. It is very important to stay true and honest to the fundamental rules of ethics and fairness.

Rule 6: Admit fallibility. Remember to take immediate action when you realize you have made a mistake. It is very important that you admit when you have made a mistake and that you take immediate steps to correct the mistake. It is a sign of maturity and of courage to own up to your own fallibility.

Rule 7: Show forgiveness. Do not let little things interfere or destroy a great relationship. Whether in your personal life or in business, relationships are precious and should not be taken lightly, so when minor disagreements occur, do not let these destroy the relationship. Show forgiveness, and move on.

Rule 8: Allow change. Be open to change, but do not compromise on your values and ethics. Through change we grow and learn. Too often, however, people tend to change for opportunistic reasons and are willing to forego all that is good and valuable for immediate gratification or greed.

Rule 9: Learn to listen. There are times when it is better to be silent than to speak. Too often, we feel the need to say our piece, but there are many situations in life where it is better to be quiet and listen. It is through listening that we learn the other person’s point of view and get a better understanding of the situation under consideration. This could be a hard rule to master for some of us.

Rule 10: Create abundance. Create a loving and harmonious atmosphere in the home. When we create an atmosphere of love, we create the foundation for happiness, abundance, and prosperity. Remember that it is through giving that we receive the greatest joy and rewards.

Rule 11: Practice quiet reflection. Spend some time alone at least once a day. This is the time you can spend to meditate and reflect on the happenings of the day. This is your opportunity to recharge and to connect with your inner self. Here you will create the foundation for your abundance and prosperity.

Rule 12: Give of yourself. Remember that in any relationship your love for each other exceeds your need for each other. In other words, it is in the giving of yourself without any attachments or expectations that you receive the greatest satisfaction and rewards.

These twelve simple rules, when followed in a consistent manner, will bring you lots of abundance, prosperity, and happiness. They will create a life experience that you will gladly look back on. They have certainly helped me in reaching my life and business goals. It will take time to learn and practice these rules faithfully, but the time spent will surely pay benefits in your life’s journey. Always have unwavering faith in what you set out to do, as long as it is done for the right reasons and within the universal rules of ethics.

by Andreas Stark